First, let me say that I am very, very sorry to have to do another post about toilets. I know it's not the first, but I promise* it will be the last!

I'm living in a two toilet world, and neither one is good.

Our home toilet is the cheapo, late 90's Super-Water-Saver Econo-John. It doesn't so much flush as it gently and momentarily ripples, like the beautiful ripple on a calm lake when an autum leaf falls. One "flush" does not work. Two or three maybe. And I have kids, which means that a couple times a week the thing gets jammed with giant wads of toilet paper. SuperDad with the plunger to the rescue once again.

Then, at work, there's the space-age-mega-pressure ultra-flush. I don't know what kind of jet propulsion system NASA had to develop for this restroom rocket, but when it goes off (which is itself top-secret. You have no control. It flushes when IT wants to, darnit!) it sounds like you are inside the engine of a 747. And now, the gross part: You actually have to jump back away from it to avoid being splashed by the F-6 scale tornado of disgusting water that sprays out. And to avoid being sucked in! Ever wonder what happens when deejays you've listened to for years suddenly just disappear? Now you know.

*not actual promise