I'd just like to reassure the vast majority of everyone that your teeth are white enough already!
I just saw a commercial for toothpaste that whitens teeth, then one for mouthwash that whitens teeth, then one for, I think, special shoes that whiten teeth. Then an "entertainment reporter" came on with these ridiculous glowing choppers that sort of blurred everything around them, like looking straight into the sun does.
Some people are clearly going too far and are beginning to resemble some sort of electric-mouthed space aliens. Clearly the toothpaste/dentist/mouthwash/CIA/Cuban/entertaiment reporter syndicate behind this scheme is making a big pile of money, having convinced everyone that you're a worthless toad unless you have a mouthfull of 500 watt lightbulbs.
You're not. You look fine. Relax.